The hunger. It is a game.

I don't want food today. I wish I could tell why, but I can't. I just know that the gnawing feeling of hunger is so satisfying today. I haven't had hardly anything to eat. I had four chicken nuggets for lunch. Thats all. And it felt like so freaking much food when I ate it. I didn't have breakfast. Daniel is taking me to dinner with his dad. If he wasn't I doubt I would eat dinner.

I really don't want it today.

It makes me feel panicked right now.

I thought I was doing better. I am reminded today that I will never be better.

hah. the hunger games. this is certainly a game. One I won't win, no matter what I do.

I wish it would just all go away. I don't want to fear food. I don't want to crave hunger the way that others crave junk food.

I binged so much yesterday. After Daniel dropped me off, I went up to my room and ate ramen and then I crammed nutella in my mouth until i felt sick.

My stomach rebelled. I felt terrible.

I ate half a bag of chocolate last night too.

This game. It's destroying me. And I fear that if I let Daniel understand, that it will destroy him too.