dissociation

I dissociated at work tonight. i got the wrong change and Scott, one of the managers, who is a guy and hes kind of a big menacing guy, in looks, (hes actually perfectly nice) and thus i am still afraid of him, was the one at work tonight. he was nice about it but I was like almost twenty dollars off. I have no idea how that happened. at all. I freaked out. and then he became all scary in my eyes and i dissociated pretty bad because he was a male authority figure who was frustrated with me.
Anyway, i'm still freaking out. Daniel is coming over and i almost dont want him to, i'm afraid i'm going to be weird. But at the same time, I don't want to be alone. I just feel like a mess tonight. I know that I will be fine but i don't feel that way.

I couldnt sing my song
I couldn't stand and sing
I crumpled, and fell
the spotlight left empty

i couldn't handle the faces
each one staring at me
I fell beneath the weight
the spotlight left empty

Whats wrong with me? I dont want to feel afraid of my manager. its so ridiculous.
I'm frustrated at myself.
I just want to not be different. i want to not feel fear. I'm tired of feeling scared of guy costumers